Something to Think About

a blog on end of life

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About the BK Team
What Families Need to Know in the Final Hours Before Death by Hospice Pioneer, Barbara Karnes, RN

Most people don't know what to do or can do in the final hours before death. Here are gentle ways families and caregivers can create a meaningful goodbye and bring...

Why Caregivers Need Written Guidance at the End of Life article by Barbara Karnes, RN

Caregivers are often alone when caring for someone who is dying. Written guidance can provide reassurance and support when it is needed most.

Why You Need an Advance Directive (Before You Think You Do) article by Barbara Karnes, RN to encourage filling out end of life wishes

Most of us don’t think about healthcare decisions until something is wrong. But in crisis, emotions take over and clear thinking becomes difficult. Planning ahead—through an advance directive and sharing...

Can You Be “Full Code” in Hospice? What Families Need to Understand blog article by End of Life Educator, Barbara Karnes, RN

Hospice and palliative care are not the same—and understanding that difference matters. If the goal is comfort and a natural death, certain medical interventions no longer fit. Let’s talk about...

What Matters Most at the End of Life: Treatment or Time Together? article by hospice nurse Barbara Karnes, RN for caregivers

Sometimes the question is not how long we can live, but how we want to live with the time we have.

Who Cares for the Caregiver in End-of-Life Work?

Those of us who work in end-of-life care walk beside people and families during one of the most intimate times of life. Because of the emotional nature of this work,...

Why Does Dying Look So Disturbing? By Barbara Karnes, RN  Sounds, restlessness, and physical changes can be unsettling to witness, but they usually don't mean there is suffering. Understanding what is normal can ease fear for those keeping vigil.

Sounds, restlessness, and physical changes can be unsettling to witness, but they usually don't mean there is suffering. Understanding what is normal can ease fear for those keeping vigil.

Can a Dying Person Choose When to Die? What Caregivers Should Know

In the final days and hours, a person may “wait” for someone to arrive—or let go when everyone is out of the room. Hospice nurse Barbara Karnes, RN, explains the...

Purple square with a green circle around the words, When Dying Looks Different Than You Expected

Most of us imagine dying will be quiet and peaceful, but real dying often looks different. Nothing bad is happening — the body is doing the natural work of letting...

As a Caregiver, If Words Fail, Let Your Actions Speak

Relationships are challenging. We don’t always get from them what we want or need. As death comes, the yearning for what we didn’t get or have with this person increases...

From Cure to Comfort: Matching Your Care to the Illness

Some illnesses are curable. Some are uncertain. And some can’t be fixed—no matter what we do. Knowing which type you or your loved one is facing can help you choose...

Introducing the Approaching Death Support Kit: Gentle, Trusted Guidance for Families and End of Life Doulas

If I could sit beside you at the bedside, this is what I would place in your hands. Whether you’re a family member, a friend, a caregiver, or an end-of-life...

Hospice nurse providing end of life care and support to family

End of life care is about bonding and developing trust — not just with the patient, but with the family and the caregiver, as well...

“It is through the eyes of fear that we react to the unknown of how life ends…”

Knowledge is important for the person dying because they are processing their life on many levels. It is important for the watchers because it is our final opportunity to connect,...

What if everyday was  “I Love You Day?”

Working with end of life all these years has shown me how special each day is. It has also shown me the value and the gift of living, doing, and...

“Some are happily planning holiday delights...”

Other people seem cheerful, happily planning holiday delights, and we, the grievers or caregivers, are reminded of what we don’t have, of what we’ve lost or are losing...

I Believe Hospice is About Healing, Building Trust and Educating

All the hours of talking, drinking coffee, and eating homemade pies was time spent healing, building trust, and educating. It wasn’t about blood pressures. It was about people, feelings, and...

Caregivers Carry The Burden

My hope in writing this blog is to draw our attention to the “unsung heroes” caring for their special person as end of life approaches, as well as to those caring...

Caregivers Need Knowledgeable Guidance

...That caregivers put so much energy, time, love, and concern into taking care of their person that they can become blind to or just plain don’t want to see the...

Always Offer, Never Force: Food At End of Life

My husband Jack  has been dead eight months. In processing the five months from his diagnosis to his death, what stands out most for me is the tension that surrounded food....

The Maps We Need to Care For the Dying

Because of knowledge we’ve lost when people began dying in places other than home, we judge approaching death by the treatments and procedures used in getting people better...

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