Front Line Workers, Do You Have Self Care Rituals?

Front Line Workers, Do You Have Self Care Rituals?

April 22 2020
During this time of crisis work it is hard to remember to take care of yourself. There doesn’t seem time for that but if you don’t at least try to put “your own oxygen mask on” you will not get the essentials you need to continue. You are carrying fear for yourself (whether realized or not), excess adrenaline just to meet the shift needs (which brings a sense of exhaustion when the shift is over), and non stop 8, 10, 12 work hours, so sleep for you is vital. Don’t neglect the basics, food, sleep, and a release of each day...

We've Just Begun Social Distancing~ Here Are My Thoughts

We've Just Begun Social Distancing~ Here Are My Thoughts

March 15 2020
Isolation from others is teaching me this about my self ——- I do a lot for others, for their thoughts of me, why else do I wear makeup? Get dressed? Bathe...

Would She Still Be Alive?

Would She Still Be Alive?

December 11 2019
It sounds like she was given morphine to ease her transition from this world to the next. Not knowing your grandmother's medical history I cannot say if the morphine was appropriate or not. What I can say is it did not kill her. She was dying...

Is Dying Defeat? A hospice perspective...

Is Dying Defeat? A hospice perspective...

September 30 2019
It is how we feel at the end of the day about ourselves and our life that comes first. Our personal well being takes priority over any amount of work that we do for others. If we don’t feel good about the work we are doing then no matter how...

Developing End of Life Expertise

Developing End of Life Expertise

July 07 2019
You have to walk the walk before you can talk the talk. Learn from your patient/family interactions. At the same time read everything you can get your hands on...

Setting Up a Hospice Program

Setting Up a Hospice Program

May 28 2019

...You really don't need a doctor or nurse at the bedside when someone is dying. You need someone who understands the natural way people die and can educate and guide those present through the experience. So, first, you are going to select employees that don't view death as a medical emergency, as a medical failure, and particularly don't view death as bad. Sad for everyone, yes, but not bad...

 

I Hear You, But I Don't Understand

I Hear You, But I Don't Understand

March 24 2019
...I remember being with my mother in my hospice Medical Director’s office. He was explaining to my mother his medical findings as they related to her illness. I, being a hospice Director and in the medical field, didn’t understand what he was talking about. My mother sat on the end of the examining table nodding her head up and down indicting that she understood. She didn’t....

SOCIAL WORKERS: I want to be like you when I grow up

SOCIAL WORKERS:  I want to be like you when I grow up

March 11 2019

This is the story that came to mind when I decided to write a blog for National Social Work month. Social work, to me, is about saying the right words at the right moment, words that have a profound effect on a person’s life from that point forward. Being the listener with just a touch of direction...

BIRTH BACKWARDS, A Daughter's Death

BIRTH BACKWARDS, A Daughter's Death

November 14 2018
At 8:17pm she took one more breath and then at 8:18 there was one more which I describe as hot caramel pouring onto vanilla ice cream. It was the most perfect breath, the most peaceful entering into another portal. I felt like I had had a complete birth experience...

Family Discord As Death Approaches

Family Discord As Death Approaches

October 16 2018
What I have discovered is that a family member dying can bring a family together. It can be their finest moment of closeness and comfort. But for other families it brings out the worst in relationship...

Purpose, Forgiveness and Meaning at End of Life

Purpose, Forgiveness and Meaning at End of Life

August 14 2018
What is the aim of a life review? As a caregiver my aim is not to direct a life review but to be a presence, a listener, and a friend. If life review becomes a subject the patient wants to pursue (whatever words may be used...

Pain, Morphine & "Dying in Peace"

Pain, Morphine & "Dying in Peace"

June 14 2018
It is certainly not within our role to act if a person, in the pain of the moment, wants help in ending their life. In the “pain of the moment” are the operative words here. I cannot tell you the number of times I have heard that plea in the throngs of pain, and the relief when that pain is relieved and life continues...

DYING Young or Old, The Signs Are The Same

DYING Young or Old, The Signs Are The Same

April 10 2018
There are other signs of approaching death that indicate a person with a disease (at any age) has weeks to live...

The Profound Affect of Dementia on Families

The Profound Affect of Dementia on Families

March 26 2018
I can say that dementia doesn’t play by the rules for end of life. Withdrawing and sleeping can be present for years and does not signify approaching death. Not eating and not swallowing are your key signs. If we don’t eat, we can’t continue to live. Always offer food (be careful of choking), but don’t force food.

THIS IS HOW PEOPLE DIE - my latest film

THIS IS HOW PEOPLE DIE - my latest film

March 13 2018

My message throughout all this time has been to educate, educate, educate. Educate anyone who will listen about how people die. To help people understand how death comes, what it looks like, (a part of life we will all experience one day) is my focus, to neutralize the fear we all bring to approaching death. With my desire to teach as many people as possible I have created a new end of life educational film, This Is How People Die.

Nursing Home Blues, Part 2

Nursing Home Blues, Part 2

February 28 2018
...Fortunately, I suppose, my mother is now bed-bound and we were able to
get Hospice to help out, so she now fits the bill for a 'model patient'... but it
still seems one nurse can wreck her entire day with a bad attitude at
changing time or bath time. And family (which is me) must try to piece back together a mindset that keeps her contented and unafraid. this is a sad time of life. And I do have the Nursing Home Blues, quite regularly...

The Nursing Home Blues

The Nursing Home Blues

February 13 2018
As we get older, life presents us with different challenges. We adapt to them in the same way we have lived our life and dealt with all the challenges in our life up to this point---only our reactions become intensified. If we were withdrawn and not very social in our earlier living then as we get older we become more withdrawn, even less social. Think about...

Grief During the Last Stages of His Life

Grief During the Last Stages of His Life

January 30 2018
From the moment of a diagnosis of a life threatening illness we begin grieving. We grieve not just the eventual losses that come with serious illness but the approaching death itself...
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