Something to Think About

a blog on end of life

We love sharing helpful info on our blog.

About the BK Team
How Are You Spending This Gift of Life?

The space between birth and death is the most important part of life YET we somehow go through the living part unaware. In a hurry, with a great deal of tension, and very little...

Denial of a Life Limiting Illness

Denial by the person with a life threatening illness, denial by the caregiver, and I’ll even add denial by some attending physicians. Denial is often the reaction to diseases that have...

Conversations and Cake: Death Cafes Around the World

I see Death Cafes as the start of a conversation; the start of opening ourselves up to exploring end of life issues; the start of breaking the belief that if I talk...

All The Ways We Have For Saying Our Final Goodbyes

We used to have grandma’s body “laid out” in the parlor and family and friends came to our home with support and food. Grandma died in the home and we...

Using Palliative Sedation At End of Life

When the terminal illness, the disease progression, has been a pain filled experience and all comfort management options have been unsuccessful, then sleep is our friend...

Always Offer, Never Force: Food At End of Life

My husband Jack  has been dead eight months. In processing the five months from his diagnosis to his death, what stands out most for me is the tension that surrounded food....

The Maps We Need to Care For the Dying

Because of knowledge we’ve lost when people began dying in places other than home, we judge approaching death by the treatments and procedures used in getting people better...

"We've done the best we can and we can't fix you..."

Someone has to have the courage to say “We’ve done the best we can. We can’t fix you. Let us help you have some quality time”.

Would You Rather Die At Home Or In The Hospital?

Most people, if they had their choice, would want to be in their home with family and the dog or cat on the bed when they die. YET, most people...

Professional Boundaries With Our Vulnerable Patients

We enter peoples’ lives as professionals. We are knowledgeable, supportive, caring, and personable. However, we are not best friends, we are not even friends, really.

The Part of Grief You Don't Know ---Until You Do

Now I have to learn how to be a widow. How to create a new life, a new way of being. I am truly alone. 

Who Are You Remembering This Holiday Season?

Death has touched us all, some more recently than others.  Grief has no actual timeline, no end point where we are suddenly “fine”.  Each of us responds to our loss...

The Words We Use When It Comes to Death

Our job as end of life workers is to educate. We walk a thin line. Our words can be heard and misunderstood so easily. They can be interpreted differently than...

Continued Sporadic Breaths After Mom Was 'Gone'

The heart is still beating even when our less sophisticated machines don’t register them. The breathing will get slower and slower and the time between breaths will get longer and...

Putting  Our House  In Order

In the days to weeks before gradual death occurs a person realizes, at last, that they are dying. They may not share that realization with anyone, but they know. If...

Do You Know About The Gems of Dementia?

I know that dementia doesn’t play by the rules of approaching death. The guidelines relating to food, sleep and sociability don’t fit with dementia. I know that  I am seeing...

"Believers" and "Non-Believers" Facing End of Life?  Is There A Difference?

We human beings are complicated creatures. We approach death in the way we have approached living and according to our personality. Our belief systems are part of that living. Sometimes...

What Do You Do When Words Become Meaningless?

I think we healthcare workers rely on our words as our offering. Explanations, suggestions, instructions, even using words to offer condolences and trying to comfort. And yes, words are a...

Helping A Family Decide Whether to End Life Support

If you have a good, amicable relationship then get them together and say, with caring in your heart, "I am going to tell you some things I have learned about...

Medical Interventions on a  Body That Can’t Be Fixed

How tragic that none can come forward and say, "Your father is dying. Let's stop all these extras and keep him comfortable”. Family as well as many individual physicians do...

Entering Into "Precious Time"

In our medical society today, it seems to be very difficult for physicians to tell patients and/or families that death is approaching; That this special person will die, and probably...

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