Something to Think About

a blog on end of life

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About the BK Team
Why Do People Hold On at the End of Life?

Why do we hang on to life so desperately? Because it is all we really know. Yes, some of us have spiritual beliefs, that talk of “another life."

How to Get More Out of Every Doctor’s Appointment

Doctor’s office visits for health issues are scary, often confusing, and too often complicated with medical terms we don’t understand. And we are generally ill or have health issues that...

A Simple Practice to Help You Notice What Matters

I’m going to share with you the thoughts of last night so you can get a picture of how this daily review works for me. Hopefully you will think it is...

What If I’m  Angry at  My Dying Parent?

First, there is no perfect relationship. Life is a learn-by-trial adventure. It’s hard work, not always smiles and happiness.

When Treatment Stops Working: What Hospice Really Offers

What do you say to someone to get them to accept hospice? Well, one thing to say after explaining the services hospice offers is to ask what they think will...

Would I Want This? A Question Every Caregiver Must Ask

It will never be “okay” for someone we care about to die, to leave us. We will always want those we care about to stay in our lives...

Think It Might Be Time for Hospice?  You're Probably Right

Death from disease and old age doesn’t just happen. There are signs and changes that begin occurring months before death arrives. You can use those signs as a reference indicating...

Introducing the Approaching Death Support Kit: Gentle, Trusted Guidance for Families and End of Life Doulas

If I could sit beside you at the bedside, this is what I would place in your hands. Whether you’re a family member, a friend, a caregiver, or an end-of-life...

What if everyday was  “I Love You Day?”

Working with end of life all these years has shown me how special each day is. It has also shown me the value and the gift of living, doing, and...

“Some are happily planning holiday delights...”

Other people seem cheerful, happily planning holiday delights, and we, the grievers or caregivers, are reminded of what we don’t have, of what we’ve lost or are losing...

Humanity In Caring For The Alzheimer's Patient

Of course each situation needs to be individually addressed but in the case of a lot of people with dementia, tell them about a death of someone close ONCE...

Supporting a Hospice Patient During Their Life Review

As end of life approaches, people start looking at their life; what they’ve accomplished, not done, who they have touched, interacted with, and the relationships they have or have not built...

I Believe Hospice is About Healing, Building Trust and Educating

All the hours of talking, drinking coffee, and eating homemade pies was time spent healing, building trust, and educating. It wasn’t about blood pressures. It was about people, feelings, and...

Caregivers Carry The Burden

My hope in writing this blog is to draw our attention to the “unsung heroes” caring for their special person as end of life approaches, as well as to those caring...

Dying Is Not Pretty

People don’t die like they do in the movies. Mom is not going not going to say some profound words, close her eyes and be dead...

Grieving is Loneliness and Aloneness

I think a big part of grieving is loneliness. Loneliness for our person who has left us but also aloneness in our day to day activities...

Caregivers Need Knowledgeable Guidance

...That caregivers put so much energy, time, love, and concern into taking care of their person that they can become blind to or just plain don’t want to see the...

Always Offer, Never Force: Food At End of Life

My husband Jack  has been dead eight months. In processing the five months from his diagnosis to his death, what stands out most for me is the tension that surrounded food....

The Maps We Need to Care For the Dying

Because of knowledge we’ve lost when people began dying in places other than home, we judge approaching death by the treatments and procedures used in getting people better...

“Who will take care of us when we can’t take care of ourselves?”

Unfortunately, as death approaches none of us will be able to take care of ourselves. There will come a point when we will need assistance. We probably won’t even be aware we...

Six Months After My Husband Died

It has been almost six months since my husband of 62 years died. As an end of life educator I have taught about loss and grief, and even wrote a booklet about it. BUT...

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