Something to Think About

a blog on end of life

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About the BK Team
Did the AIDS Epidemic Set Us Up To Handle COVID-19? by Barbara Karnes, RN

There are many of the same circumstances with today’s coronavirus as we faced with  HIV/AIDS in the early years— lack of medical knowledge, lack of guidance, and fear. I think...

HOSPICE DEATH CALL~ How To Comfort A Family You've Never Met by Barbara Karnes RN

We do this all the time. We enter tense situations where people are frightened and unsure, with people who have never seen us before. This is what we do: We create...

GRIEF- Struggling After Mom's Death by Barbara Karnes, RN

Often after a person dies we forget that there is no perfect relationship, that there are easy times and difficult times. Somehow once a person dies we elevate them to...

BIRTH BACKWARDS, A Daughter's Death by Barbara Karnes, RN

At 8:17pm she took one more breath and then at 8:18 there was one more which I describe as hot caramel pouring onto vanilla ice cream. It was the most...

Family Discord As Death Approaches

What I have discovered is that a family member dying can bring a family together. It can be their finest moment of closeness and comfort. But for other families it...

A PLACE IN MY HEART, When A Pet Dies by Barbara Karnes, RN

We can be as much at a loss when our pet is dying as we are when a person is dying but there doesn’t seem to be the support and...

Where Is The Hospice I Know And Love? by Barbara Karnes, RN www.bkbooks.com

Hospice can not take the experience and sadness of a loved one dying away. Our goal is to help the family create a sacred experience, to help their loved one...

3 Things You Can Do As Someone Is Dying by Barbara Karnes, RN

The hours before actual death is very scary, a "I don't know what to do" time, for anyone present. Someone who knows the normal natural way a person dies can...

Calories Count by Barbara Karnes, RN

When living with a life threatening illness we are eating for two---our physical body and our disease. In most cases the disease eats before we do. If we don’t eat,...

DYING Young or Old, The Signs Are The Same by Barbara Karnes, RN

There are other signs of approaching death that indicate a person with a disease (at any age) has weeks to live...

Nursing Home Blues, Part 2 by Barbara Karnes, RN

...Fortunately, I suppose, my mother is now bed-bound and we were able toget Hospice to help out, so she now fits the bill for a 'model patient'... but itstill seems...

The Nursing Home Blues by Barbara Karnes, RN www.bkbooks.com

As we get older, life presents us with different challenges. We adapt to them in the same way we have lived our life and dealt with all the challenges in...

Grief During the Last Stages of His Life

From the moment of a diagnosis of a life threatening illness we begin grieving. We grieve not just the eventual losses that come with serious illness but the approaching death...

How Do I Pick A Good Hospice? by Barbara Karnes, RN  www.bkbooks.com

There have been many changes in hospice care since it began. Some for the better, some not so much. What I am suggesting as representing a “good” hospice is becoming...

Telling A Loved One They're Dying by Barbara Karnes, RN www.bkbooks.com

...not telling a person they can’t be fixed is taking away their opportunity to do and say that which is important to them. It is taking away their ability to...

Barbara Karnes, RN speaks to the question, "Do people really die of a broken heart?"

I know “dying of a broken heart” is used frequently when death comes as a result of a tragic life event. I’m not sure that is actually why the person...