Something to Think About

a blog on end of life

We love sharing helpful info on our blog.

About the BK Team
For Those With Heavy Feelings of Loss

How to let go and stop feeling guilty? At first you probably aren't even aware of your feelings. When someone close to us dies, even if we are told it...

When Doctors Can't Fix My Ailing Body, I Want to Close My Eyes And...

We have all sorts of fears around dying and death so we keep thoughts of end of life at bay. We are like ostriches who bury their heads in the...

The Amazing Grace of Mary Nell: Barbara Karnes, RN

Mary Nell’s son in law, Ted, sent me this writing. It is so poignant I asked him if I could share it with my blog readers. It is longer than...

Infant Loss: Barbara Karnes, RN

October 15 was National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. I’ve been asked to write about the grief experienced with the loss of a baby through miscarriage or stillbirth. I...

Caring for the Alzheimer's Patient

Living with someone who has dementia is a daily challenge. It requires the constant reminder that this person is not who they once were. It presents the challenge of learning...

Barbara Karnes, RN speaks to the question, "Do people really die of a broken heart?"

I know “dying of a broken heart” is used frequently when death comes as a result of a tragic life event. I’m not sure that is actually why the person...

Caring For One of Our Own article by Hospice Pioneer Barbara Karnes, RN

My husband tells the story of me asking our hospice nurse how long she thought my mother had to live (a question all families ask). My husband knew that I...

The Only Survivor: Barbara Karnes, RN

Having friends, interacting with others, is an important part of that living. Even introverts need one or two people with whom to relate. I don’t know how old you are,...

Making Decisions: Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: If a family member suffers a stroke what is the right decision about whether to use a feeding tube? I think it depends on what a person’s mind and...

Letting Go... Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: What to do if the Doctor suggests stopping life support? RESPONSE: No one wants to be in the position of determining when a person dies, not doctors, not family....

Good Decisions: Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: What are we trying to achieve by treatment? That is THE question everyone involved in medical decision making needs to ask. Who is everyone? Physician, patient, and family. Most...

The Future: Barbara Karnes, RN

I caught myself thinking, as I folded laundry this evening, that I want this day to end. I want this week to hurry up as I have something in the...

Three Keys: Barbara Karnes, RN

We can die gradually two ways. We just get old and our body wears out or we get a life threatening illness, disease, and die gradually that way....

Alzheimer's, Dementia Patients and Hospice: Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: Please speak to Hospice Approval Denied due to only major diagnosis code being Alzheimer's and not considered to be in final stage. But person not eating, ~70 lbs now,...

Is a Peaceful Unmedicated Death Possible? Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: I am a 30 year old woman working as a psychology intern at a local hospital. My engagement in the hospice program has me thinking a lot about my...

Oxygen, Morphine and Air Hunger

What we have learned that seems to be more helpful than administering oxygen is to give a small amount (the operative word here is “small”) of Morphine. The morphine can...

Dementia Doesn't Play By The Rules: Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: My question is about when someone with advanced dementia is in that sort of vague pre-active dying period, say those months in and out of the hospital, the time...

The "Do Over" Barbara Karnes, RN

Then one day I got a phone call saying the baby was found dead in its crib---SIDS Only we didn’t call it Sudden Infant Death Syndrome then. It was just...

God or no God? Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: I am a Hospice Nurse for 3+ years but have been a nurse for over 35 years with varying experiences with death and dying prior to my present Hospice...

Labor: Barbara Karnes, RN

QUESTION: Please expound upon the "Labor of Dying" mentioned in this blog. Dying from disease and old age has a process to it. That process begins two to four months...

The Odds, Google and The Big Question: Barbara Karnes, RN

Generally speaking, a person goes to a physician because something is amiss with their physical body. We don't feel well so we go to doctors for help. Physicians "fix" what...

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