Who Are You Remembering This Holiday Season?

Bless you and thank you for everything
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BK Books replied:
Rose, you are welcome. Blessings! Barbara

Dear Barbara,

Thank you for your honesty and guidance this holiday season.
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BK Books replied:
Margy, you are welcome. Blessings back to you. Barbara

Thank you Barbara. I am a hospice volunteer. Our volunteer coordinator shares your posts with us frequently. May this season fill you with joy and prosperity for you are that which is: kindness, compassion, and love. Many blessings for you and those you love in 2024, Beryl

Thank you Barbara. I am a hospice volunteer. Our volunteer coordinator shares your posts with us frequently. May this season fill you with joy and prosperity for you are that which is: kindness, compassion, and love. Many blessings for you and those you love in 2024, Beryl
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BK Books replied:
Hi Beryl, I am so pleased you are finding my blogs helpful and that your volunteer coordinator is sharing some of them with you. You could go to bkbooks.com, my website, and sign up to receive your own blogs each week. Blessings to you in the work you are doing. Barbara

Thank you Barbara. I am a hospice volunteer. Our volunteer coordinator shares your posts with us frequently. May this season fill you with joy and prosperity for you are that which is: kindness, compassion, and love. Many blessings for you and those you love in 2024, Beryl

Dearest Barbara, Thank You for your encouraging words. Having just lost my mom in October, and my Dad, 2 years ago, it is so hard to be motivated to celebrate anything. I miss them so much. I’m going to try to go forward using your suggestion to honor their lives, by living in joy. Blessings to you this holiday season too!
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BK Books replied:
Hi Shirley, have a joyful holiday while you hold your mom and dad in your heart. Blessings! Barbara

Barbara, even though the work you do to help educate others about dying and grieving is so powerful, I know that the death of your beloved husband takes you to a new realm of understanding. Wishing you peace on the journey. I lost my mom Christmas Day of 2005, and dad at Thanksgiving of 2009. This time of the year is not sad for me anymore, but it certainly isn’t what the holidays were like prior to their deaths. I simply give thanks for every day that I open my eyes and have a chance to make a difference in the world, whether it is in my work as a hospice bereavement coordinator, or my new studies to become an end of life doula through IDLM. ;-) Take good care of yourself!
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BK Books replied:
Kathy, It is exciting to hear you are studying with IDLM to be an EOL doula. I work with Anna and Pam frequently. An excellent program. Maybe I’ll see you on our next zoom session. Blessings to you in your new adventure. Blessings! Barbara

Dear Barbar
Thank you for your books and words of encouragement. I have a friend who recently lost her sister, her only sibling and I have shared your books with her. I know all too well the hole in our heart that losing someone you love makes but I also celebrate the joy of had having them in my life. Over the years I from sharing their stories and knowing that they are with me every day, that love never dies the hole in my heart is growing small each year.
May you feel the love of your husband as you celebrate the gift of the Christ Child this Christmas Season and thank you for help some many deal with their grief. God Bless Vivian
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BK Books replied:
Hi Vivian, thank you for your insightful words. Blessings to you this Holiday season. Barbara

Barbara you are an inspiration to everyone who comes to know you. I learned of your work from the hospice nurse who first cared for my mom. I wish I had read your “gone from my site” book as soon as it was given to me instead of after my mom passed. This Christmas you are part of the caregivers group who have also just lost a person close to us. I am sorry for your loss! And pray you take the great advice that you give all of your followers ❤️
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BK Books replied:
Hi Karen, interesting you say you wish you had read my booklet before your mom’s death. I keep suggesting hospice nurses read it with the family so they will have the guidance to see their special person is doing what is natural and normal. Blessings to you this holiday season. Barbara

Barbara,
I first bought your books when a friend from church passed away. I knew that my father in law would be passing soon and didn’t know how to cope. He passed this September. This email had perfect timing as my husband mourns this holiday season and cares for his mom.

Thank you for your words and your willingness to speak them. God bless you, Barbara!
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BK Books replied:
Brittany, my husband died in September also. We are watching his favorite Christmas movie Christmas Eve to include him in our activities. Blessings to you and your family. Barbara

Thank-You Barbara for your helpful books. They were arrived just when I needed them. My 44 yr. old nephew died just 38 days after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. It was totally unexpected. One month before that my 96 yr old mother-in-law died, which was expected, but still hard. I was glad I had your books. They were written in such a quiet and comforting manner. Praying we can all have a peaceful holiday no matter how we are able to celebrate it. Elaine.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Elaine, such losses so close together. Be sure to talk about and include them in your holiday, the tears and the laughter. Blessings! Barbara

‘relief can be found among the details’ & ‘the emotional residue that is left all over the place is what we have to work with upon someones death’ – these 2 sets of thoughts were offered to me as a young teen when my mother passed on Christmas morning. I often can find peace when grief is weighing heavily on the day/moment if I can breathe and navigate back to these perspectives.
Appreciate your share of thoughts as well and will weave them in as needed.
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BK Books replied:
Heather, thank you for sharing your way of coping with grief. Blessings! Barbara

Hi Barbara,

Just want you to know how very special you are and the impact you’ve had on me, my career, and the lives of the patients I serve. As a fairly seasoned nurse (17 years) but relatively new to Hospice nurse (1.5 years) I have relied on and learned so much from you and your educational materials. I have my own personal set of your books that I loan to patients and families and your work and experiences have truly touched and guided them. I also refer them to your website. I love Hospice/Palliative care so much and can’t say thank you enough for sharing your wisdom & heart with all of us. Thinking of you this holiday season, all the best to you and your family.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Rachel, Thanks for the kind words about my work. So pleased they have helped you do this special work. Blessings to you! Barbara

Know you are facing the holidays alone for the first time. Thanks for your helpful words to the rest of us. I just wanted you to know we remember your loss this season, as well. Marcia

Know you are facing the holidays alone for the first time. Thanks for your helpful words to the rest of us. I just wanted you to know we remember your loss this season, as well. Marcia

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BK Books replied:
Marcia, thank you for your kind words also. Blessings! Barbara

Hi Barbara, I started to read your newsletters 2 years ago when we were going to be with my dad who was passing away. Then my mom departed last month unexpectedly but peacefully. As an acupuncturist, I know the phases of grief, etc. and now realize knowing and doing are two different things. Today, your words resonate with me. Thank you!
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BK Books replied:
Hi Yuko, I know sometimes what our minds is thinking and our heart is feeling are two different things. Blessings to you. Barbara

Dear Barbara, Thank you as always for your most helpful suggestions for making it thru a difficult holiday season. Thank you for reminding us to be thankful…..I find that is easy to forget when I am in the throws of grief. You are in my prayers.

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BK Books replied:
Thank you Susan for your comments. Grieving is hard work. It can often make everything around us look as dark as we are feeling. Blessings! Barbara

Thank you so much for your healing words, Barbara. I just received your set of grief and loss booklets in the mail. My grief counselor especially recommended, “Gone From My Sight”. I think it might be a little too soon for me to read it, because I really struggled with the part about what to expect 1-3 months before a person dies.
My former husband passed away this past July and his death has hit me harder than I had ever expected it to. He and I still had a close relationship and we talked everyday. We were married for 15 years only, but we had known each other for 50 years. We had a special bond.
I would have much preferred not doing anything for Christmas this year. Plus. Like you, this season reminds me of all the other people that I have lost, especially my mom and dad.
Thanks for allowing me to offer my comments in response to what you had written!
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BK Books replied:
Hi Christine, reading Gone From My Sight may help you understand your former husband’s journey as his life ended. Read *My Friend, I Care *now for guidance in your grieving. Blessings! Barbara

Thank you Barbara for these thoughts. I will try to use one or two of them to help me through this season. As a large close family always being together, it is difficult to adjust to “something other” since my parents are deceased. I’m at the 4 and 5 year mark coming up in the early new year and it is hitting me harder this year.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Joan, I have had others tell me the second, third and other years can be harder than the first. Maybe the first we are still a little numb. Blessings! Barbara

Your words of encouragement are greatly appreciated. You be sure to enjoy your family and friends, we are only blessed with the hour and the day. Merry Christmas 🎄
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BK Books replied:
Thank you, Cheri. Blessings! Barbara

Thank you so much for this reminder for the holiday season. It is so true-it does not matter how recent or how far in the past someone has gone. We continue to remember and hopefully are able to share memories with each other.

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BK Books replied:
Cathy, thank you for your comments. Blessings! Barbara

Thank you for this I’m still sitting at my desk at work crying because nothing feels the same I feel like I lost a part of me 16 years ago my only child, another part my 4 years ago my mom and another part my nephew it well be 3 years the day after Xmas he was the live of the party, I missed them so much.
I’m going to write them a letter and burn it scatter the ashes to the wind.
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BK Books replied:
Oh Denise, so many losses. My blessings to you. Barbara

my wife of 32 years passed 3 years ago. holidays are very rough. like driving a car with 3 wheels. i miss her very much and someday we will speak to each other again
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BK Books replied:
Carl, I like your analogy of the 3 wheeled car. Blessings! Barbara

I’ve created a memorial in my bedroom with my wife’s ashes, pictures and other memorabilia. Every night B4 I go to bed, I talk to her, tell her what I did that day & how I’m doing, tell her that I love her the biggest of all bigness, and pray that her day in the spiritual world was THE BEST. Very rarely do I have unpleasant dreams anymore.
Carl
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BK Books replied:
Thank you for sharing your bedtime ritual. Blessings! Barbara

Thank you, always, Barbara. Thinking of you and sending healing thoughts this holiday season. You help many every day. 🕊️
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BK Books replied:
Thank you, Jennifer. Blessings to you! Barbara

Dear Barbara, this blog is spot on, and I appreciate your words. I feel for you this Christmas as you navigate without your beloved Jack. I am navigating the first Christmas without my dad. Thank you for sharing. In healing hopes, Colleen

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BK Books replied:
Hi Colleen, thank you for reaching out to me. We will be traveling similar roads this season. Blessings! Barbara

That is so comforting and true. When we mentioned our loved one. It makes it easier for others to mention their name too.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Lorrie, mentioning their name and reminiscing about times spent kind of includes them in our holiday. Blessings! Barbara