Something to Think About

The experience of dying a gradual death is an important, integral part of life. It is an opportunity to write our final chapter, to define the ending of our story...

Just as we have to go through an intensive process to enter this world, so do we go through labor to leave it.

This is a guide all would be wise to complete now (and regularly update) before the information is needed. It is a gift to those left behind...

Knowledge is important for the person dying because they are processing their life on many levels. It is important for the watchers because it is our final opportunity to connect,...

How about an end of the year review? Let's take some time to remember and think through our struggles, our misadventures, and assess our strengths...

We used to have role models on what dying really looks like. People died at home, in their own bed. Family and friends gathered — held a vigil, so to speak. When...

The space between birth and death is the most important part of life YET we somehow go through the living part unaware. In a hurry, with a great deal of tension, and very little...

Denial by the person with a life threatening illness, denial by the caregiver, and I’ll even add denial by some attending physicians. Denial is often the reaction to diseases that have...

I see Death Cafes as the start of a conversation; the start of opening ourselves up to exploring end of life issues; the start of breaking the belief that if I talk...

We used to have grandma’s body “laid out” in the parlor and family and friends came to our home with support and food. Grandma died in the home and we...

When the terminal illness, the disease progression, has been a pain filled experience and all comfort management options have been unsuccessful, then sleep is our friend...

My husband Jack  has been dead eight months. In processing the five months from his diagnosis to his death, what stands out most for me is the tension that surrounded food....

Because of knowledge we’ve lost when people began dying in places other than home, we judge approaching death by the treatments and procedures used in getting people better...

Someone has to have the courage to say “We’ve done the best we can. We can’t fix you. Let us help you have some quality time”.

Most people, if they had their choice, would want to be in their home with family and the dog or cat on the bed when they die. YET, most people...

We enter peoples’ lives as professionals. We are knowledgeable, supportive, caring, and personable. However, we are not best friends, we are not even friends, really.

Now I have to learn how to be a widow. How to create a new life, a new way of being. I am truly alone. 

Death has touched us all, some more recently than others.  Grief has no actual timeline, no end point where we are suddenly “fine”.  Each of us responds to our loss...

The heart is still beating even when our less sophisticated machines don’t register them. The breathing will get slower and slower and the time between breaths will get longer and...

In the days to weeks before gradual death occurs a person realizes, at last, that they are dying. They may not share that realization with anyone, but they know. If...

I know that dementia doesn’t play by the rules of approaching death. The guidelines relating to food, sleep and sociability don’t fit with dementia. I know that  I am seeing...