Something to Think About
a blog on end of life
We cannot put a number on how long someone has to live. There are so many factors that affect the time of our gradual death that the closest anyone can...
In the months before death when the patient is still alert, still actively engaging, watch for clues, for openings to help bring the "what has life been about" thoughts forward...
The more you learn about end of life, what happens, what it looks like, the less fear you will bring to the experience and with less fear you can get...
Dying isn’t about the disease a person has. It is about the emotional, communal response to the person dying from the disease. It doesn’t require medical intervention. It requires comfort...
Know that all of these signs of approaching death, whether indicating months or weeks, are just guideposts. Some people will show all of them...
...Rapid breathing like your dad was doing is exactly where a small bit of morphine (5 ml is small) helps slow down those 40/50 breaths a minute to a more...
How do you answer a family member when they ask you how much longer their loved one has to live? That is a question most family members want to know and...
Most diseases have a pattern. You generally know what to expect. With dementia there seems to be no pattern, at least as far as approaching death is concerned until they...
Hospice was perfect for them. Charles had a life threatening illness, had refused further treatment, and they were alone. We were there to give them support and guidance. Charles and...
With Hospice you never know what you will find once you enter the home. Service can’t be time based. Visits have to be stay until the job is done and...
You asked why your relationship to your hospice work was affected following the death of your dad. I think because every time you entered a patient's home and life it...
Keeping Secrets: “Don’t tell mom.” Don’t say that she could die.” Don’t talk to her about “sad” things.” “Pretend everything is going to be alright.” Mom lives inside of her body....
I get a lot of letters like the one I’ve edited below. We, as a culture, are so unprepared for witnessing a death. We have no accurate role models. We...
Know that all of these signs of approaching death, whether indicating months or weeks, are just guideposts. Some people will show all of them...
We believe from all signs that death is rapidly approaching. Then one morning they seem to actually wake up. They are less confused, they want to eat, or get up....
First, what is meant by “dying person”? In the months before death most people really don’t believe they are dying. “Other people die, not me. There will be a cure,...
Our children are not supposed to die before we do. I cannot think of any grief more intense than watching our child deteriorate before our eyes. We grieve their dying...
Sudden death by accident, suicide and certainly by violence intensifies those normal grief responses. Everything we feel with normal grief is as if we are being held under a magnifying...
Our job as an end of life specialist is to address the elephant in the room, to be direct and honest in the gentlest way possible. We are not doing...
People don’t die like they do in the movies—alive one minute, saying something profound and dead the next. There is a way that the body dies. A way it is...
There are many of the same circumstances with today’s coronavirus as we faced with HIV/AIDS in the early years— lack of medical knowledge, lack of guidance, and fear. I think...
