How impersonal our healthcare system has become! From the doctor’s office to the scans, lab techs, hospitalists, and yes, even to the nurses, it seems most of the medical community - except maybe the CNAs - focus on the disease rather than acknowledging that there is a person in the bed or on the cart.
I believe everyone is well-meaning and knowledgeable, but people — scared, hurting people — need more than diagnoses, evaluations, and medical procedures. They also need their humanity recognized and honored.
Healthcare professionals — the person you see before you is scared and generally does not comprehend the extent of their situation. Add to that they are sitting without proper clothing coverage, or lying in an uncomfortable position, and feeling very small.
I’m asking you to see this person first. Look into their eyes, touch them, give them your name, sit if you can. Meet the person first, put them at ease, and then do the doctor, nurse, or healthcare thing.
Keeping the person in mind, ask these questions before you leave the room:
• Did you understand everything we talked about?
• Is there anything else you would like to ask me?
• Is there anything else you want to talk about?
We in healthcare are taking care of people that have diseases or physical conditions that require attention. Yet let us remember there is a feeling person inside who has the malady we are addressing.
Something more... about compassionate caregiving
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5 comments
Kathy Lashinsky
I am a Hospice Volunteer Coordinator and my message to my volunteers is, “We are helping people live until they die.” Everyone is going to die, so let’s show them we are going to helping them live through the end of this journey because “Everyone Matters”.
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BK Books replied:
So true. An important truth to share with your volunteers. Blessings to you in the work you are doing. Barbara
I am a Hospice Volunteer Coordinator and my message to my volunteers is, “We are helping people live until they die.” Everyone is going to die, so let’s show them we are going to helping them live through the end of this journey because “Everyone Matters”.
———
BK Books replied:
So true. An important truth to share with your volunteers. Blessings to you in the work you are doing. Barbara
Melissa
Very important subject but unfortunately I think it is how much of the population has come to treat the sick and elderly as if they no longer have a voice. You see the same treatment sometimes within family members in the way they interact with the dying family member….as if they were already gone. It is sad to see as this person was the lifeblood of the family and held the unit together for all those years only to be treated like they have already passed.
As far as hospitals, the last one I was in i was able to escape before treatment and I faired much better because of it.
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BK Books replied:
I know Melissa, we seem to be losing sight of the person that lives inside this body we have. Thank you for sharing these thoughts. Blessings! Barbara
Very important subject but unfortunately I think it is how much of the population has come to treat the sick and elderly as if they no longer have a voice. You see the same treatment sometimes within family members in the way they interact with the dying family member….as if they were already gone. It is sad to see as this person was the lifeblood of the family and held the unit together for all those years only to be treated like they have already passed.
As far as hospitals, the last one I was in i was able to escape before treatment and I faired much better because of it.
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BK Books replied:
I know Melissa, we seem to be losing sight of the person that lives inside this body we have. Thank you for sharing these thoughts. Blessings! Barbara
Ruth Franke
Barbara,
Thank you so much for acknowledging the role of the CNA. For me, my “job” as a CNA was all about addressing the person in front of me – including loved ones. The CNA has the advantage of not having “business” to address during his/her visit. More than once, though, I did have to make up for the insensitivity of one of those professionals. Most of the team members I worked with were kind and compassionate, for which I am grateful. It’s the medical team that came before the hospice admission whose approach needed some fine-tuning.
I am so grateful for the privilege of caring for hospice for 8 1/2 years. I’m retired now and I miss the “work” nearly every day.
Thank you for all that you do and have done to spread the hospice message and provide information to support patients, loved ones, and hospice workers and volunteers.
God bless you,
Ruth
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BK Books replied:
Hi Ruth, thank you for your years of service as a CNA in hospice. You were front line, a vital, essential part of the team. Blessings! Barbara
Barbara,
Thank you so much for acknowledging the role of the CNA. For me, my “job” as a CNA was all about addressing the person in front of me – including loved ones. The CNA has the advantage of not having “business” to address during his/her visit. More than once, though, I did have to make up for the insensitivity of one of those professionals. Most of the team members I worked with were kind and compassionate, for which I am grateful. It’s the medical team that came before the hospice admission whose approach needed some fine-tuning.
I am so grateful for the privilege of caring for hospice for 8 1/2 years. I’m retired now and I miss the “work” nearly every day.
Thank you for all that you do and have done to spread the hospice message and provide information to support patients, loved ones, and hospice workers and volunteers.
God bless you,
Ruth
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BK Books replied:
Hi Ruth, thank you for your years of service as a CNA in hospice. You were front line, a vital, essential part of the team. Blessings! Barbara
JMS
This is such a needed reminder, and it’s written with so much care – the specific, concrete asks (sit down, give your name, ask if they understood) are exactly the kind of thing that actually changes a room, not just a vague call to “be more compassionate.”
I’d only add one layer to it: a lot of what reads as impersonal isn’t really a failure of individual healthcare workers’ character – it’s what happens when clinicians are given seven minutes per patient, are documenting in an EHR while trying to make eye contact, and are evaluated on throughput and billing codes rather than on whether the patient felt seen. Most people go into this work because they do want to see the whole person. The system they’re working inside often doesn’t leave room for it – chronic understaffing, productivity quotas, defensive documentation driven by liability – and the CNAs you noted as the exception often have more unstructured time with patients precisely because they’re not the ones being timed against a schedule.
So maybe the ask isn’t only “healthcare professionals, see the person first” but also “systems, build in the time and staffing that makes that possible” – otherwise we’re asking exhausted, overextended people to individually resist a structure that’s pushing the opposite way.
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BK Books replied:
JMS, I so agree our system makes it very challenging to get beyond the understaffing, detailed documentation, and legislative requirements BUT we need to find a way to look patients in the eyes, talk with them, reassure them, recognize their humanity. Blessings! Barbara
This is such a needed reminder, and it’s written with so much care – the specific, concrete asks (sit down, give your name, ask if they understood) are exactly the kind of thing that actually changes a room, not just a vague call to “be more compassionate.”
I’d only add one layer to it: a lot of what reads as impersonal isn’t really a failure of individual healthcare workers’ character – it’s what happens when clinicians are given seven minutes per patient, are documenting in an EHR while trying to make eye contact, and are evaluated on throughput and billing codes rather than on whether the patient felt seen. Most people go into this work because they do want to see the whole person. The system they’re working inside often doesn’t leave room for it – chronic understaffing, productivity quotas, defensive documentation driven by liability – and the CNAs you noted as the exception often have more unstructured time with patients precisely because they’re not the ones being timed against a schedule.
So maybe the ask isn’t only “healthcare professionals, see the person first” but also “systems, build in the time and staffing that makes that possible” – otherwise we’re asking exhausted, overextended people to individually resist a structure that’s pushing the opposite way.
———
BK Books replied:
JMS, I so agree our system makes it very challenging to get beyond the understaffing, detailed documentation, and legislative requirements BUT we need to find a way to look patients in the eyes, talk with them, reassure them, recognize their humanity. Blessings! Barbara
Alice
This hit home for me. My dad is at the hospital now, over 3 weeks, and every day he wants and needs more information and understanding about what’s happening to him and unless someone in my family “nails them to the wall”, doctors and nurses do not take the time to explain the overall situation and take the time to be with him. When asked and insisted upon, they will do it, but as a ‘par for the course’, no. That’s not standard operating procedure and it is wholly unsatisfactory. There are always exceptions and some of the doctors DO take the time, but it puts a lot of pressure on them.
I really appreciate reading and listening to your experiences and recommendations. It gives credence to my experience as the daughter of the (dad) who’s so uncomfortable, bored and sick of the hospital, but who is also not cleared for discharge yet because hospice care involves a lot for him and more caregiving than he/my mom can afford.
Thanks,
Alice
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BK Books replied:
Hi Alice, it is so sad that there is an isolation of mind and spirit that occurs in the healthcare setting with all the emphasis on the physical. Yes, it is about the physical malfunction but we need to recognize there is emotional and mental healing to do as well. Blessings! Barbara
This hit home for me. My dad is at the hospital now, over 3 weeks, and every day he wants and needs more information and understanding about what’s happening to him and unless someone in my family “nails them to the wall”, doctors and nurses do not take the time to explain the overall situation and take the time to be with him. When asked and insisted upon, they will do it, but as a ‘par for the course’, no. That’s not standard operating procedure and it is wholly unsatisfactory. There are always exceptions and some of the doctors DO take the time, but it puts a lot of pressure on them.
I really appreciate reading and listening to your experiences and recommendations. It gives credence to my experience as the daughter of the (dad) who’s so uncomfortable, bored and sick of the hospital, but who is also not cleared for discharge yet because hospice care involves a lot for him and more caregiving than he/my mom can afford.
Thanks,
Alice
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BK Books replied:
Hi Alice, it is so sad that there is an isolation of mind and spirit that occurs in the healthcare setting with all the emphasis on the physical. Yes, it is about the physical malfunction but we need to recognize there is emotional and mental healing to do as well. Blessings! Barbara