Dear Barbara, My mother is in final stages (or is she?). Has not had food or a drop of water in 16 days. She is in a coma state and receives morphine several times a day. Her only illness is dementia. I guess my question is, how much longer can she survive?
Many factors will affect the time in which your mother dies. Her body size can be one factor; generally, the more body reserves a person has, the longer the process may take. If the morphine is being given with IV fluids, then she is being hydrated and that can extend her life as well as contribute to increased congestion. If she has no other disease process, I wonder why she is receiving any morphine at all. Dying is not painful–disease causes pain and dementia is generally not physically painful.
If she has had no water of any kind for 16 days I would expect her to die at anytime–maybe before I write this.
I do not have enough information to be specific about the unfolding of your mother’s dying process. Dementia is an umbrella term for changes in memory, thinking, and functioning that can be caused by a number of different diseases. If there is no disease process other than dementia, then her body is shutting down because of the lack of food and water. I know that sounds harsh but if she is unresponsive then by not intervening with artificial feeding and hydrating, you are allowing death to arrive in its natural, normal way.
Remember there is a huge difference between just breathing and actually living. I often ask, “Would you want to be attached to machines and just breathing with no cognitive functioning?” These are deeply personal decisions. It is not wrong or a “sin” to choose not to pursue medical interventions when they will not offer the quality of living a person would want.
In these last days with your mother, talk to her as though she can hear and understand you. Tell her what she has meant to you. Tell her of your love. Use this special time to say goodbye.
Something more about... "16 Days Without Food or Water"
The use of narcotics with end-of-life patients is challenging at best for not only family caregivers, but also for healthcare workers. Much of that confusion is addressed on my NEW BOOKLET, Always Offer, Never Force: Food At End of Life. If you are caring for a loved one with dementia, my booklet, How Do I Know You? Dementia at End of Life will support you with the unique signs of approaching death with a dementia patient.
2 comments
Celeste Schiller
Always good for folks to know that small doses of morphine also help alleviate air hunger (a fan lightly blowing on the face can help as well) especially for those with lung issues like COPD or cardiac conditions such as CHF that can cause shortness of breath.
Some patients with dementia may have other conditions that are not life threatening but add to the big picture.
Always good for folks to know that small doses of morphine also help alleviate air hunger (a fan lightly blowing on the face can help as well) especially for those with lung issues like COPD or cardiac conditions such as CHF that can cause shortness of breath.
Some patients with dementia may have other conditions that are not life threatening but add to the big picture.
allison schallert
I am grateful to be reminded that, when there is not disease death is generally not painful. I had a great conversation with the hospice care and now both my parents are off all medications and will only be given morphine if they are in pain.
I am grateful to be reminded that, when there is not disease death is generally not painful. I had a great conversation with the hospice care and now both my parents are off all medications and will only be given morphine if they are in pain.