How Are You Doing With The Collective Grief We Are All Feeling?

We are a planet grieving. So many losses! Physical death from the pandemic and other assorted calamities; wildfires bringing loss of homes, wildlife, even the air we breathe. Political, not going to touch there, but losses too. Storms, flooding, loss of property, and life. Loss of our freedoms—touch, togetherness; loss of our jobs which brings loss of homes again. I’ll stop here but actually the list goes on and on. 

I’ll say again, we are a planet grieving. What does grief look like? Grief is an emotional expression. It comes out in the way we have learned to express our feelings.

If we show our emotions through anger, we will be angry in our grief. Look at all the anger being expressed in the news today! The violence, shootings, protests, lack of consideration for others and selfishness are all expressions of anger, expressions of the collective grief we are feeling.  A watered down form of anger is irritably, raised voices, and impatience.  Anger held inward, not expressed in its many forms, becomes depression. For those of us not comfortable expressing our anger outright we express our grief by just plain being depressed. A heavy, sad feeling that incorporates all that we do.

Some express their emotions by being busy, very busy. If they keep busy they won’t feel. They won’t have to acknowledge how scared, how sad, how frightened, how lost they are.

Some of us have reached the place where just getting out of bed is a challenge. We hurt so much, our grief is so heavy, we just want to pull the covers over our head, eyes and heart so we don’t have to feel.

Tears can be grief coming out of our eyes. We cry at everything. “If you look at me funny I’ll cry. If you don’t look at me funny I’ll cry.” Some of us don’t cry, seem to not feel, BUT know most of us feel. It comes out somehow, somewhere.

All of these are different ways we express our grief. We have lost so much in the last year and half, loved ones through death, loved ones through loss of physical touch and proximity. We lost our freedom to be and do, to express who we are, to choose what we do, where we go and what we do when we get there.

Last month it seemed the end was in sight. We could move forward BUT no, that didn’t happen. Instead, we’ve added another loss to the weight we bear. The loss of the hope that this nightmare of a pandemic is almost over. The loss of the normal we are so desperately wanting to return.

Something More...  about How Are You Doing With The Collective Grief We Are Feeling?
I wrote a booklet for the grieving process. It was written for those whose loved one had recently died, but is applicable to all forms of grief. You may find the booklet, My Friend, I Care: The Grief Experience, here.  

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9 comments

Mae Quigley

I love you, Barbara!
You always speak to my heart and reaffirm that I am on the right path in my life.
———
BK Books replied:
Hi Mae, What kind words you have for me. Thank you.Blessings! Barbara

J.

Thank you! It’s a good reminder that we are not alone in these feelings.

Maria

Always blessed by your articles! Great insight and encouragement for those of us grieving. Thank you for your devotion to helping those who grieve.

margo

I really appreciate your materials… very helpful

barbara

Hi Carrie, you asked if you could share the blog post on grief with your volunteers. Certainly you can share any of my blogs. You may want to tell your volunteers to go to my website bkbooks.com and sign up for the blog and their own copy will arrive in their email box. Blessings! Barbara

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