I have always been on the taking-care-of-people side of healthcare. Recently, my role switched and I found myself on the being-taken-care-of side. (Not to worry, I am fine now. My broken ankle is healing.)
I think the biggest challenge I had as a patient was not being seen as more than a physical problem needing to be fixed. What has left a lasting impression on me is that person-to-person human interaction is just as healing as the procedures performed, and that our medical emphasis is often not on the person and those interactions, but on the problem.
Most healthcare providers do a job that is needed at any given time—surgery, procedures, medication, even taking blood pressure and checking vital signs. But from a patient perspective, it felt as if I was a nonentity. Everyone was kind, but seemed detached from my humanity.
The role of the patient looks entirely different when you are the patient. Submission and powerlessness become the places you find yourself. All the experts tell you what you need to do—or even simply do it without telling you—as if there is no person inside, only a procedure to accomplish. What has left a lasting impression on me is that person-to-person human interaction is just as healing as the procedures performed.
I’ve known about the medical world's difficulty in seeing the person and have written about it, even recently. But having just gone through the ER, surgery, hospitalization, and rehab, I am now experiencing my own words.
It shouldn’t have been the CNAs who stand out as the people who saw me as a person trapped inside a challenging body—and yet they are the ones I remember most.
It was an interesting ride being on the other side of healthcare. As a result of this recent experience, I think it would be very educational if every medical and nursing student had a three-day experience of total bedrest in a hospital and nursing facility. They would learn firsthand the importance of seeing the person beyond the physical malady. Seeing that person is as healing as the procedures themselves.
Something more...
Knowledge Reduces Fear, Volumes I & Volume 2 helps healthcare professionals bring understanding, confidence, and compassion to every interaction.
11 comments
Kathy
A few thoughts.
I work in physical therapy. You cannot help heal the physical until you address the emotional- that means caring for the human before you care for the injury.
When a patient is snappy/grumpy/demanding, 9 out of 10 times, they are trying to regain control of their lives. They feel that controlling others gives them back their power and autonomy.
The patient needs to be seen and heard, especially when they are not healing as expected. If you just listen, the patient will often lead you to the solution.
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BK Books replied:
Absolutely, Kathy. Well said. Blessings to you. Barbara
A few thoughts.
I work in physical therapy. You cannot help heal the physical until you address the emotional- that means caring for the human before you care for the injury.
When a patient is snappy/grumpy/demanding, 9 out of 10 times, they are trying to regain control of their lives. They feel that controlling others gives them back their power and autonomy.
The patient needs to be seen and heard, especially when they are not healing as expected. If you just listen, the patient will often lead you to the solution.
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BK Books replied:
Absolutely, Kathy. Well said. Blessings to you. Barbara
Polly Sears
I have recently returned home after 5+weeks in rehab for a broken ankle (right),and, a severe sprain in the left. I could have written your post. I am a Very independent person, lived alone for the past 35 years, so, although I am polite and like people, I know what is best for me. I found- much to the chagrin of the nurses and aides- that "telling " me what and when to do things wasn’t the best way to get results. I worked with Hospice when I lived in NH. Wonderful organization. You can’t assume to know what is best for the patients you have to take cues from them.Not always easy, but, it is the patients life. I have duplicates of all your Wonderful pamphlets.
Sincerely,
Polly Sears
Client =patient
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BK Books replied:
Hi Polly, sounds like you and I just walked similar paths, right down to the broken ankle. Hope you are healing well. Blessings! Barbara
I have recently returned home after 5+weeks in rehab for a broken ankle (right),and, a severe sprain in the left. I could have written your post. I am a Very independent person, lived alone for the past 35 years, so, although I am polite and like people, I know what is best for me. I found- much to the chagrin of the nurses and aides- that "telling " me what and when to do things wasn’t the best way to get results. I worked with Hospice when I lived in NH. Wonderful organization. You can’t assume to know what is best for the patients you have to take cues from them.Not always easy, but, it is the patients life. I have duplicates of all your Wonderful pamphlets.
Sincerely,
Polly Sears
Client =patient
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BK Books replied:
Hi Polly, sounds like you and I just walked similar paths, right down to the broken ankle. Hope you are healing well. Blessings! Barbara
Eileen Wolfington
I admire the time you take to eloquently wrote about the reality of what occurs when a caregiver becomes the patient. During my later career, I worked as a community health worker for a nonprofit clinic. I attended hundreds of doctor appointments serving as an advocate for our patients. It was during a time when electronic medical records were being implemented. Not only has technology dampened the human interaction between the provider and the patient, but it turned compassionate care into what I observed has become an assembly line of getting patients in and getting them out within a limited amount of time. Sadly, I suspect this may be due to focusing on more insurance reimbursements and more money in their pocket. Thanks for the work that you do Barbara. I enjoy following you and gaining insight.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Eileen, I agree. Electronic medical recording changed health care from looking at the person, eye to eye, to looking at the computer screen. A big loss for health care. Blessings! Barbara
I admire the time you take to eloquently wrote about the reality of what occurs when a caregiver becomes the patient. During my later career, I worked as a community health worker for a nonprofit clinic. I attended hundreds of doctor appointments serving as an advocate for our patients. It was during a time when electronic medical records were being implemented. Not only has technology dampened the human interaction between the provider and the patient, but it turned compassionate care into what I observed has become an assembly line of getting patients in and getting them out within a limited amount of time. Sadly, I suspect this may be due to focusing on more insurance reimbursements and more money in their pocket. Thanks for the work that you do Barbara. I enjoy following you and gaining insight.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Eileen, I agree. Electronic medical recording changed health care from looking at the person, eye to eye, to looking at the computer screen. A big loss for health care. Blessings! Barbara
Lisa
The Doctor is a wonderful movie recommendation! I would also recommend Awakenings and Patch Adams (Both with Robin Williams) for seeing patients as people not diseases.
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BK Books replied:
Thank you, Lisa. I’ll check them out. Blessings! Barbara
The Doctor is a wonderful movie recommendation! I would also recommend Awakenings and Patch Adams (Both with Robin Williams) for seeing patients as people not diseases.
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BK Books replied:
Thank you, Lisa. I’ll check them out. Blessings! Barbara
Melissa
I can relate totally to what you are saying even to the point that as a patient in the past in hospitals I felt I had no say over my body and the procedures that the doctors wanted to perform. Nothing scares me more than being at the mercy of others and totally helpless to do anything. I frankly would rather drag myself off into the woods and die.
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BK Books replied:
Melissa, I don’t want you running off to the woods to die. We, the patient, have to learn to ask questions and be our advocate. Blessings! Barbara
I can relate totally to what you are saying even to the point that as a patient in the past in hospitals I felt I had no say over my body and the procedures that the doctors wanted to perform. Nothing scares me more than being at the mercy of others and totally helpless to do anything. I frankly would rather drag myself off into the woods and die.
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BK Books replied:
Melissa, I don’t want you running off to the woods to die. We, the patient, have to learn to ask questions and be our advocate. Blessings! Barbara
Emma D
Thank you, that was a wonderful message about caregiving.
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BK Books replied:
You’re welcome, Emma. Blessings! Barbara
Thank you, that was a wonderful message about caregiving.
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BK Books replied:
You’re welcome, Emma. Blessings! Barbara
Carolyn
Hi Barb and thank you for sharing your insights and vulnerability….hopefully, those that need to know it will read it! All the best for a speedy recovery.
Be well,
Carolyn
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BK Books replied:
Hi Carolyn, thanks for the positive thoughts. Blessings! Barbara
Hi Barb and thank you for sharing your insights and vulnerability….hopefully, those that need to know it will read it! All the best for a speedy recovery.
Be well,
Carolyn
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BK Books replied:
Hi Carolyn, thanks for the positive thoughts. Blessings! Barbara
Debbie Walter
I can totally relate to this! I spent a week in the hospital and then another week at a skilled nursing facility after a severe case of vertigo. The doctor breezed in, and 5 minutes later was gone. It was the CNA’s and rehab folks who actually talked to me.
I can totally relate to this! I spent a week in the hospital and then another week at a skilled nursing facility after a severe case of vertigo. The doctor breezed in, and 5 minutes later was gone. It was the CNA’s and rehab folks who actually talked to me.
Debbie Walter
I can totally relate to this! I spent a week in the hospital and then another week at a skilled nursing facility after a severe case of vertigo. The doctor breezed in, and 5 minutes later was gone. It was the CNA’s and rehab folks who actually talked to me.
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BK Books replied:
I know Debbie, it’s hard being invisible when literally our life depends on others. Blessings! Barbara
I can totally relate to this! I spent a week in the hospital and then another week at a skilled nursing facility after a severe case of vertigo. The doctor breezed in, and 5 minutes later was gone. It was the CNA’s and rehab folks who actually talked to me.
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BK Books replied:
I know Debbie, it’s hard being invisible when literally our life depends on others. Blessings! Barbara
Cathy O'Keefe
I used to require that my students watch a movie called The Doctor starring William Hurt. I highly recommend it to your readers. The doctor starts out as a typically self absorbed surgeon with a big ego and sees only the procedure, not the patient. Then, he is diagnosed with cancer and has to be treated by a physician with the same kind of impersonal approach. He is humanized by the patients he encounters in the waiting room and eventually becomes the kind of doctor we would all love to have: compassionate, fiercely human, and an agent of change. I have to tell you that during the movie there is a scene where this doctor gets a procedure not meant for him – a barium enema. The audience in the theater cheered!!! I was stunned but realized that we’d reached a point at that time when so many people felt overlooked, depersonalized, and irrelevant, that it took the art of movie making to reflect Americans’ disdain for the health care system. You’ll love it. Hope you feel better soon, Barbara. I’ve been doing end of life support for over 40 years, and I follow you closely.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Cathy, I’ll see if I can find the movie. Sounds like it should be required viewing by our medical professionals. Blessings! Barbara
I used to require that my students watch a movie called The Doctor starring William Hurt. I highly recommend it to your readers. The doctor starts out as a typically self absorbed surgeon with a big ego and sees only the procedure, not the patient. Then, he is diagnosed with cancer and has to be treated by a physician with the same kind of impersonal approach. He is humanized by the patients he encounters in the waiting room and eventually becomes the kind of doctor we would all love to have: compassionate, fiercely human, and an agent of change. I have to tell you that during the movie there is a scene where this doctor gets a procedure not meant for him – a barium enema. The audience in the theater cheered!!! I was stunned but realized that we’d reached a point at that time when so many people felt overlooked, depersonalized, and irrelevant, that it took the art of movie making to reflect Americans’ disdain for the health care system. You’ll love it. Hope you feel better soon, Barbara. I’ve been doing end of life support for over 40 years, and I follow you closely.
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BK Books replied:
Hi Cathy, I’ll see if I can find the movie. Sounds like it should be required viewing by our medical professionals. Blessings! Barbara
janb
Hi Barb, Much thanks for acknowledging the need for relational care and intervention during HC needs. I’ve recommended your Hospice materials to many caregivers and family. I recognize the need for a How-To and referrals and references for being a medical advocate in caregiving roles. LMK if you have access to such materials and instructional aids. Our best on your continued recovery and continued guidance. You are appreciated.
Janb
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BK Books replied:
Janb, thank you for your comments and your appreciation. Blessings! Barbara
Hi Barb, Much thanks for acknowledging the need for relational care and intervention during HC needs. I’ve recommended your Hospice materials to many caregivers and family. I recognize the need for a How-To and referrals and references for being a medical advocate in caregiving roles. LMK if you have access to such materials and instructional aids. Our best on your continued recovery and continued guidance. You are appreciated.
Janb
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BK Books replied:
Janb, thank you for your comments and your appreciation. Blessings! Barbara