Most religions of the world teach us that when we are dead we are in a better place. I add to that that being dead is easy while being alive is very hard. That said, why do we have such a hard time letting a loved one die when treatment is not working, when extra ordinary measures are not producing desired results, when quality of life becomes a question vs. just breathing or having machines facilitate breath?
It will never be “okay” for someone we care about to die, to leave us. We will always want those we care about to stay in our lives. The thing we need to remember is that everyone dies. We will all lose someone we love and want with us. That is life. The question then becomes can we get ourselves to a place where we understand that now is the time that our love one is going to leave us? Can we get to a place of accepting, not that it is okay to die but that this is the time it is going to happen? Can we put our own feelings of loss and abandonment aside and think unselfishly? Can we put ourselves in the position of the person we care about and say to ourselves “Would I want to be like this? Is this how I would want to die?” If the answer is no, and it probably will be, then make the tough decisions. Stay by the bed side, say your goodbyes and remember our belief is they will be in a better place than we are.
