There are very few dying 101 classes to tell people what it is like to die. In fact, few people are comfortable enough to talk about death even when they or someone they love is dying.

Imagine the following scenario: Mom is dying. She is in the bedroom; all the family is present, going in and out of the room. Outside mom’s room everyone is crying but when it is our turn to go into the bedroom we stop crying, stand up straight and walk to her bedside with a smile on our face. “Hey Mom, how are you doing? You know if you will just eat you’ll feel better. Why we’ll be in that shopping mall before you know it.” We squeeze her hand, kiss her, tell her how much we love her, she smiles playing this game with us and then we leave the room to resume crying.


Nobody tells us when we are dying. Few people can say, “Mom, you are dying. I don’t know when but I know it is going to happen, let’s talk”.

Gradual death gives us an opportunity to do and say those things we need to do and say if we will take it. Most of us don’t.